The other day I was waiting for my friend at the metro just as you enter to catch the train. As I was standing there waiting, two other Black women, who in my opinion were attractive ladies, were standing a little distance from me. Well, as another Black woman came through the entrance (where you pay) she said something in reference to her being fabulous to her friends a little loud and in true ghetto-fabulous fashion. But, it's not her that took me aback, it was the comment I overheard from one of the other two ladies.
Hating-@ss woman: "It ain't like she isn't ugly."
Now, she could have been referring to someone else, but the coincidence of these two events occurring close to each others decreases the likelihood that she was indeed doing so. As I continued to stand by myself, in a dress, blazer, heels, and cute jewelry I might add, waiting for my friend I noticed something else.
I kept getting harsh stares from Black women. And no, I'm not paranoid. I'm a people watcher, so I watched white women continue to walk pass, but Black women would stare at me
Later that night I was talking with, let's call her Mrs. X, and she was telling me how her girlfriends would always comment as Black women walked passed them: "Oh, she think she cute," "She know she shouldn't have even worn that," or "She ain't all that." We are talking about women who are 30+ now making these comments. Women who should, I use the term "should" loosely, be secure and confident with who they are and how they look.
So why is it that Black women hate on other Black women? Why can't a Black woman think she is cute or the sh*t?
I know when I get all dolled up for a special night out or for work, I don't think, but I know I am cute. Simply because I put time and effort into my appearance
Mrs. X offered one intriguing explanation: There can't be more than one Queen B.
Why is it that there can't be more than one Queen B or can there be? Why can't Black women get along? Where does the hate come from? Do guys even have this same issue?
This is definitely something I've noticed. I was just talking about it yesterday.
ReplyDeleteI hate when I get those looks with someone remarking "oh she think she cute" or "she think she better b/c she light skinned." The funny thing is I don't do anything but just maybe dress up and put on a little bit of makeup. It's really sad that this is something I see wayy too often amongst women in general. It's almost like women don't know how to just be happy and secure in themselves instead of always finding some "fault" in someone else.
I may be wrong, but sometimes I wonder if it has to do with what a woman's "purpose" was and is sometimes even still looked at as. I wonder if it's become this competition to be the prettiest or sexiest in a man's eyes, instead of just looking good for ourselves.
I sure know if I see a woman with some cute shoes, I won't be insulting, I'll be asking where she got those shoes. lol.
I still have a lot to ponder on concerning this issue.