Thou Shalt Not Have Relations With Married Men...

For some reason I am still shocked to discover that women I've known my whole life and whom I have been very close to mess with married men. Of course, if married men are cheating, they must be cheating with someone! But, I can not fathom why any single woman in her right mind would want to date or sex a married man.

I believe in the silent code amongst upstanding Black women. I may not know who the woman is, but if a man has a woman he's dating, I refuse to discuss any topics or engage in any acts that I would call a foul on if my significant other had done the exact same thing. I represent probably a small percentage of Black women who honors and respect the code.


It's sad because the act of sleeping with a married man or a man in a committed relationship is very common nowadays. Fantasia! Separated or not, that man was not divorced from his wife. Yes, some men lie, but there are always signs, ALWAYS! One being, he never spends the night or that tan line around his left ring finger. Just saying.

Back on topic... Now, some people may say "if there's no ring, then he's on the market," but I guarantee you these same people would be crying their hearts out if their partner cheated. But it's a open market right?! D@mn hypocrites.


Seriously, as Black women and men, we have to do better! A Black woman cheating with a married man or a man in a committed relationship only diminishes the respect for Black love and relationships. It also sanctions the act of cheating for Black men in these relationships because let's face it, by today's ridiculous gender biases the woman will be a ho for sleeping around and the man, well he's the man. I don't agree with it at all, but how often does this seem to be the case!


Black men need to realize that a "real" man knows self-control (I hate using the world real but for lack of a better word). Black women need to realize that honey, you probably aren't the first, won't be the last, and if you get him - 9 times out of 10 how you get him, is how you lose him.


Have some dignity and respect not only for yourself, but for other people. Any person who willingly commits an act that they know may cause harm or hurt, is a person who is not whole or happy on the inside.It takes two people to cheat and both parties should be equally responsible for their wrongdoing.



Let's be and do better. What you do in the dark will come to light! I bet you wouldn't want your pastor or child knowing about your secret indiscretions, would you?



Did I take it to far? I am somewhat of an idealist. Would you ever sleep or date a married man or someone in a relationship? Have you been that man or woman that cheated? What is your take on this phenomena?